Hard to Help the Helpers
When Todd injured his foot, Dylan appeared on our doorstep with a bucket of signature IPA beers, and a bottle of my favorite wine. Dylan was aware how just a small gesture of kindness could turn our moods around.
“I’m putting together a fundraising team for the Best Buddies ride,” Todd expressed to Dylan. “Happy to help” was Dylan’s immediate response. He did not burden Todd with the business trip he had to rearrange, kid’s activities he had to juggle, or his failing health. He met his fundraising goal, he conquered the 100-mile bike ride, and he met the team at the finish line for a celebratory lobster dinner, albeit tired and sore but without one complaint. Dylan was that guy who was always willing and happy to help. He seemed to find the reason to say ‘yes’ to your suggestion, versus his many well-justified reasons to say ‘no’. He would agree to anything on the spot and then go figure out how to make it happen. He was truly an amazing role model.
When I started teaching a 5:30 a.m. spin class, Dylan was the first person to sign-up and attend. To be truthful, he hated my spin class, complaining that it couldn’t compete with an outdoor ride but he faithfully attended in support and gave me music requests to make it more enjoyable. He eventually convinced others to join, which led to them doing a CrossFit class for years to come. In that same year, I joined the Goodnow Library Foundation and he offered to help me in my new fundraising role, providing his experience and insight from his time on the YMCA Board in Connecticut. Dylan believed in the power of community and wrote our first appeal letter urging our town to support the library. His creative efforts were successful and it started an annual tradition that continues through today. He knew how to ask for support.
It is hard to help the helpers. Dylan was battling a terminal illness that involved so many ups and downs and many of us struggled to find a way to support the man who lived much of his life helping others. Dylan's friends and family visited from all over to give him one last laugh and hug, which in hindsight turned out to be the best way to help the helper in his final chapter. He left much too early, but in his short years, he cemented a lifelong legacy of generosity, kindness, and love with so many.
We can help Dylan today by helping those he left behind. And don’t be shy about your efforts. Helping can be highly contagious.
